One unknown brick at a time

I started to build without realising I was building. There were no blueprints, there was no vision and mission. I was simply hanging out with Holy Spirit and enjoying this new creative journey with Him. I didn't even know what I was creating most of the time. There would be layers and layers of paint, fabric or clay that didn't look like anything in particular - but it felt like something and I knew I had to keep going until a story began to form.

Each layer contributed to the story. Sometimes it would start off looking beautiful, then as I continued with the process it would become messy and chaotic - leaving me feeling dejected and unsure about whether or not I had listened well. Then I would make the decision to carry on and somehow something would start to look beautiful again.

It was hard to not give up in the middle when I thought it looked hideous and when I was insecure about my abilities. It was hard not to give up when I wondered whether or not I had heard Holy Spirits voice correctly. It was hard not give up when I thought about how the original layers looked cool and artistic, and would have appealed to the masses making them easier to sell. It was hard getting to the end of the story, fully in awe of what the Lord had revealed through the process and then and realising that maybe not everyone would understand what this was - maybe this image would only be understood by one other person, and that would have to be enough.

But it was SO fun. It was so freeing not to understand, not to know, to be completely dependent on the voice of the one who loves me the most, the one who I trust the most. It was fun to get messy, it felt safe to know that if I messed up, Jesus would restore the image step by step - as long as I followed His voice. It was all about following His sound, His voice, His heart.

Maybe I don't need to know what I am building, maybe I just get to be radical and have fun with Holy Spirit as He leads me step by step and gives me one tiny brick at a time.

Maybe it's just more fun this way. xo